I got stood up today so I bought a flat screen TV.
This in lieu of ice cream during a strict diet that I am actually sticking to.
Ice cream is cheaper than a flat screen but the purpose is the same. Make me feel better when someone else makes me feel like crap.
Please no comments that I shouldn't let someone else make me feel bad about myself. Let's maintain some proportion. It's not an overall self esteem issue. Just a short lived self pitying wallowing. The ice cream effects my hips and the TV my wallet, but I can provide a dozen proofs that I deserve them both.
I look in the mirror and I say, "who is this stunning lady and why does she get stood up?" Again, a dozen reasons why I don't mind being free and independent but when push comes to shove, I'd rather not be alone.
I wish I could say that I am going home now with Ben and Jerry to watch my flat screen TV, but I am going to buy lettuce. I have also been ordered to stock the mess hall with enough snacks for 12 teenagers who are marching into my living room to rendezvous with that 15 year old girl/woman/hormonal terror with braces that lurks in my house because I'm her mother.
Why do i feel like I'm losing a war of attrition on all fronts? It's OK. For now I'll wallow. After the weekend, the generals in my head and heart will regroup and set out with new marching orders.
Hope I don't come back with a purple heart.