I have done it again. Love evades me so I bought a flat screen TV.
Last time I did it, it was instead of ice cream. This time the cache is full of the new summer flavors.
As if it weren't enough that I feel heartbroken, I hate myself for my obvious and trite methods of consoling myself. Ice cream (obvious), shopping spree (trite).
I do however stand out from the lonely hearts crowd by going big when I need comfort. I buy major appliances.
- The one that got away warranted a garbage disposal.
- The one that stood me up won me a small flat screen TV.
- The date from purgatory replaced my dryer.
- And now the misbegotten affection has hit the jackpot with the large flat screen TV, in front of which I will deplete the above mentioned cache while watching all seasons of Project Runway and imagine that it is I who gets Tim's hug of doom before being sent to clean up my space.
Suddenly the expression "Go big or go home" seems ironic. I have found the way to go big AND go home.
Maybe I'm not that trite after all.
